Healing from the Obsessive Twin Flame Phase: 8 Empowering Strategies
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It's possible I could have penned this piece long ago, but I hesitated due to feelings of embarrassment. If you've experienced a twin flame relationship, you may relate.
Reflecting on the "obsessive" stage of my own twin flame journey is emotionally challenging. One of my readers aptly labeled it a "blissful turmoil."
If I were to illustrate the obsession I had for my twin flame, a tornado would only partially capture it. Much like a tornado, it possesses an overwhelming force that feels beyond human control, drawing you in with immense power. You attempt to escape, only to find yourself caught in its whirlwind. Acceptance of this reality becomes your only option.
You brace yourself for the fallout.
Regardless of how you articulate it, it is utterly draining to wake up, navigate your day, and end your night consumed by thoughts of someone who may not even be present in your life.
Energetically, you expend a staggering amount of life force, feeling as if you no longer belong to yourself. Your thoughts and emotions become tinted by their presence—or absence. You find yourself disconnected from your body, trapped in a mental maze.
> The psychological term for this state is "limerence," which describes an intense yearning for another person, even when that desire is not reciprocated.
While you may be losing significant life energy, it is often counterbalanced by the intensity of your feelings. This is the love aspect—the sensation of being intertwined with your soul's mate.
This love can also inspire a surge of creativity, prompting you to fill journals with thoughts, write poetry, or feel a newfound drive to improve your physical health and overall life. It often comes with an urgent call to engage in shadow work and personal healing.
That was certainly my experience.
I'm not here to assess whether this emotional rollercoaster, this "blissful turmoil," is beneficial. I recognize that this phase is vital for your spiritual awakening and can serve as a catalyst for profound healing your soul has chosen to undergo.
I do not judge you; rather, I extend compassion and share the specific tools that aided me in overcoming my twin flame obsession and integrating that experience into my being.
When you feel ready to move beyond the phase where your existence revolves around your twin flame, perhaps these tools can assist you as well:
#1 Redirecting Obsessive Energy into Achieving Your Aspirations
After meeting my twin flame, I not only committed to becoming fit, but I also pursued a long-held dream of studying acting, a goal I previously deemed unworthy.
During my obsessive phase, I experienced an unprecedented surge of energy. This led me to apply to an acting school in Los Angeles—and I was accepted! The confidence gained from caring for myself deeply and achieving my dreams was unparalleled.
However, the pandemic struck, halting my acting course and granting me more time to obsess over my twin flame, but also…
#2 Embrace Journaling
Never underestimate the power of writing. If traditional journaling isn't your style, consider recording your thoughts. It's essential to articulate the feelings and thoughts swirling in your mind regarding your twin flame.
Before my twin flame, I struggled with consistent journaling. However, the emotional turmoil I faced compelled me to confide in my journal, as no one around me could comprehend my experience.
#3 "I Am the Right One to Love Myself!"
This video holds a significant place in my heart. I discovered Iyanla Vanzant through Oprah Winfrey, and her message resonated with the core issue driving my twin flame obsession: "You have forgotten that you are the right one to love you."
Ultimately, the journey leads back to this simple yet profound truth: what you seek lies not in others, but within yourself.
> As Iyanla articulates: "You are the right one to love, nurture, and care for yourself. Until we embrace this truth, we will continue attracting reflections of our internal beliefs."
#4 The Book: Women Who Love Too Much
This book illuminated my unhealthy patterns. It made it clear that loving someone "too much"—or more than oneself—is not normal. Past pain from love during childhood can lead to attracting relationships that bring both love and hurt.
Your obsession is a call to explore your past and heal what has lingered since before you met your twin flame.
#5 "One Meditation a Day Keeps Obsessive Thoughts Away"
While every tool in this list has the potential to aid your healing, nothing is simpler or more beneficial than meditation, whether guided or silent.
In 2018, I found it challenging to sit still for even three minutes. Now, after years of practice, I can meditate for hours and find it increasingly rewarding.
If you can muster the courage to sit in silence regularly, you'll soon realize that you are not defined by your thoughts or emotions. Observing your feelings grants you strength and distance from pain.
#6 Past Life Regression
This may not resonate with everyone, as it leans more towards spirituality than empirical science. However, if you feel drawn to it and can locate a reputable practitioner, past life regression can provide clarity and empowerment.
My regression session, conducted online from 9,350 kilometers away, was profoundly revealing. I discovered connections between my past life and current experiences, particularly regarding my twin flame relationship.
In a past life in 18th-century France, I had been a powerful woman, yet my tumultuous love life led to deep sorrow and ultimately, my demise.
The session was emotionally taxing, but it left me feeling more grounded than ever. I understood that my twin flame experience was meant to facilitate healing from past wounds.
#7 Insights from Abraham Hicks
Abraham Hicks was a pivotal part of my healing journey. I stumbled upon their teachings while exploring the Law of Attraction.
Abraham offers uplifting guidance that empowers you to cultivate inner joy and manifest your desired reality by focusing solely on what you want. Engaging with their content felt like a happiness infusion.
Through Abraham's teachings, I learned that my happiness is independent of my twin flame, and that self-empowerment is key to attracting positive experiences.
#8 Psychic Medium Session
As my obsessive phase was nearing its end, I felt compelled to consult a psychic medium. Faced with a significant decision regarding my Master's in Psychology, I sought external validation.
The medium, unaware of my situation, confirmed what my past-life regression had revealed: our souls had been intertwined for many lifetimes, necessitating separation for personal growth.
After that session, I felt an immense sense of relief. I understood that the need to obsess had diminished; I still loved my twin flame but felt no attachment.
This realization dawned on me: obsession stems from misunderstanding. Once clarity is achieved, the need for obsession dissipates, granting freedom.
I recognize that this may not be a tranquil time in your life. It can feel overwhelming, but I see your strength!
You are preparing for a divinely healed existence. You possess the capability to overcome this. The universe believes in you, and I do too!
With love, Jessica Engji