Chapter 1: A Pivotal Moment in Myrtle Beach

During a family vacation in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, when my youngest son was eight, we embarked on a mini-golf outing. Before this fun activity, I had to assist him with his CCD homework. Although I attended Catholic elementary school, my children were enrolled in public schools, attending CCD classes weekly at our church.

“We just need to wrap up this last question,” I informed him, reading it aloud. He replied, “I want to ask God for a hole-in-one.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” I responded. “That’s not quite what the question means. It’s about asking God how we can serve others better, like seeking guidance on loving more.”

“I want to ask God for a hole-in-one,” he repeated, resolute.

Despite my attempts to clarify, he was fixated on his goal. Eventually, we left our condo, enjoying various activities before finally arriving at the mini-golf course. A few hours had passed since we began his homework.

My other two boys were aged 11 and 13, and the course presented a challenge, even for my husband, an avid golfer. Upon reaching the final hole, which sloped downward and stretched about three yards, we took turns, none of us coming close to the hole.

Then it was my youngest’s turn. To our amazement, the ball rolled right in. “Oh my gosh,” I exclaimed. “I can’t believe you got a hole-in-one!”

Looking up with a smile, he said, “I can. I asked God for it.”

In that moment, I realized I had forgotten the power of faith. I turned to my husband, acknowledging the lesson learned: never underestimate what a child can ask of God.

Section 1.1: Reflecting on Marital Challenges

During a restless night amidst marital turmoil, anger towards God bubbled within me. “Why?” I questioned. “As a child of divorce, why must I endure this again? My children shouldn’t have to face the pain of divorce. I know all too well what that feels like.”

This unfamiliar bitterness caught me off guard. “What’s wrong with me?” I wondered. “I’ve never been one to wallow in self-pity.”

As I contemplated my feelings, I pondered the changes in my life. I had grown up with a single mother after my father left when I was five, a man who faded in and out of our lives like a distant memory. My mother raised my siblings and me with love and resilience, ensuring we had everything we needed despite her struggles.

I worked from a young age, supporting myself through high school and college, often helping my mother financially. When both parents passed away at 28, I found myself questioning God again. “Why take her when she was our only parent? Why him when we had so much unresolved between us?”

But I quickly realized my mother wouldn’t want me to dwell in despair. A spiritual beacon, she instilled in us the belief that our path was sacred. She taught us to feel blessed, regardless of our circumstances.

Subsection 1.1.1: The Wisdom of a Grandparent

My sister once shared a saying from our grandfather: “If you went down to the corner store to exchange your problems, you’d come back with your own.”

Yet, I found myself tossing and turning, drowning in self-pity. It was then I recognized the true loss: my spirituality. I was in conflict with God and my life’s journey. It was time to let go. Every indication in my life pointed to an inevitable divorce.

When I finally surrendered, I lost my gold wedding band. It felt like God was urging me to move on. Holding onto bitterness and anger while trying to maintain faith is unsustainable. While it’s normal to feel hurt, it’s how we respond to those feelings that define us.

Chapter 2: The Journey to Healing

The first video, "Moving On When Your Marriage Doesn't | Therapy & Theology," delves into the intricacies of moving forward after marital strife. It emphasizes the importance of self-reflection and seeking divine guidance in times of turmoil.

The second video, "Marital Separation and Spiritual Awakening," explores the relationship between personal growth and the challenges faced during separation, offering insights on spiritual awakening amid relational issues.