Chapter 1: The Desire for Connection

We all yearn to feel part of something greater than ourselves.

Indeed, these so-called “greater things” can bond us in unexpected ways. Recently, I watched a film that sparked my thoughts on this topic. The movie, Inside, available on Netflix, tells the story of a couple who, after losing their son, abduct another child to fill the emotional void left in their lives. While the plot is certainly disturbing, it reflects a deeper aspect of human nature.

A key realization is this: love is not about possession; rather, it liberates. True love does not confine you; it opens doors, encouraging you to stay willingly. However, the other side of love can lead us to emotional manipulation in our quest for acceptance.

This phenomenon explains why educated individuals can become entangled in harmful ideologies, such as the Nazi Party, or why victims of domestic violence may repeatedly return to their abusers. It also sheds light on why some citizens seem ready to compromise democratic values for the sake of partisan loyalty in upcoming elections. There’s a sense of security that comes from belonging to a group, even when that group is fundamentally flawed.

For the next half-minute, let me speculate on why this occurs. Here’s my hypothesis, albeit one lacking rigorous scientific backing: we become lost within the collective identity of a group. When we do, we often neglect self-reflection, deriving our self-worth from group affiliation rather than from our own self-perception.

Why does this happen? I suspect many of us would rather be accepted than be authentic. Isn't this a recurring theme throughout human history? Some may argue, “Clint, you choose to express your authentic self here regularly.” To that, I’d reply: “You have no idea how challenging it can be to pursue authenticity.”

Being genuine here means confronting both the admirable and unflattering aspects of myself. This struggle can lead to a fracturing of the identity we’ve carefully constructed. While authenticity can help us learn to love ourselves, it may also alienate others who are not ready for that level of honesty. Perhaps authenticity truly is a double-edged sword.

Yet, here’s the twist: despite my efforts to be open in this space, I find it difficult to do so in my personal life. If I were completely authentic, I might have left my job today. Spoiler alert: I didn’t.

This is where the challenge lies. Authenticity is undeniably valuable. It’s a beautiful act to share one’s feelings openly, and it takes courage to be emotionally vulnerable. This vulnerability can foster a sense of connection and lessen feelings of isolation.

However, perhaps this is only the initial step toward true authenticity. Perhaps it requires more than just honesty; it calls for action. I’m still striving to embrace that aspect fully.

Chapter 2: The Impact of External Validation

The first video, "Lauren Spencer Smith - That Part," explores themes of love and loss, resonating with our need for connection.

The second video, "Daniel Caesar - Best Part (feat. H.E.R.)," beautifully encapsulates the essence of love and emotional intimacy, reinforcing our quest for belonging.